I got the apartment! I am so excited. Several rather humorous things happened these last few days, and I can't wait to tell you about them.

First thing first: I woke up Friday morning and went downstairs-Steve was in a great mood, as was I.

The phone rang. It was Asia, with Fairwood.
And she told us we got the APARTMENT! Eek!

Not only that, but it's ground floor, right across from the street from the laundry room, and really close to the entrance.

Not only that, but it's 5 minutes away from work.

And 2 bedroom.

FOR less than 500 a month!

EEK!

It's gregarious.

Then we went and got our checks-found out we had over a grand between us, so we paid the deposit, Steves insurance, and went and looked at couches, chairs, notified the post office of our new address, and went to my nephews birthday party.

I started Zoloft yesterday.

IT MADE ME HIGH. Seriously. When I got up, the room was swimming. I went into the bathroom and curled up in a little ball at the bottom of the tub while steamy hot water poured on me. I felt medicated. Drugged. Not myself. It was terrible. Then I went to the party, and went home, and fell asleep. For the next few hours, I alternated from waking every three minutes because I felt like I was falling, to not being able to sleep, to being so unable to move that Steve thought something was wrong.
Then he came to bed and I started cracking jokes and talking about swimming sweatshirts, and wierd stuff. Revelation after revelation came to me, and Steve told me I wasn't allowed to take Zoloft anymore.

Woke up this morning, feeling slightly better, but eveything was slightly off. I feel like a Zombie. I'm not sleepy-just feel funky.

I worry about the effects this may have on my baby, although my doctor did tell me that it wouldn't hurt him. I can't help but think- If I'm reacting this badly, how must Alex be feeling?

Some thoughts, streamers?

Also, we're moving into the apartment on Tuesday. So keep us in your thoughts, as I have to worry about dealing with Steve's father-who has the audacity to tell us that he wanted us out the same day. As if he's ever home enough to make a difference. No one notices when he's gone-except out of relief. But you can definitely tell when he's there-he tends to make snide remarks that cut all the time. Yeah. I don't care for him.

Anyways, let me know what you think. I'm just a little worried and want to know if you think what I'm doing is right or not.

Have a good weekend. talk to you Monday.

I am so happy. So happy, I put 3 crazy's. Now that's wild.

*ahem*

I went to my doc appointment today, and found out several wonderful things. 1-there is a doctor out there that isn't cruel and tall. She's short, plump, and pleasant. And I asked her to be my doctor! And she smiled, all flattered, and said try Dr. Sanderson once more, and then if I still want to be with her, then I could.

I'd feel a lot more comfortable with Ronnie.

But that's not the best news!! the best news is, I went into the doctors office kinda dreading it, because I was going to set up payment arrangements-because Health and Welfare and I weren't getting along. Turns out, we were, and I didn't know it.
I got approved for insurance through the state! That is exciting! Now I don't have to worry about any bills, or any appointments of awkwardness.
It's all paid for.

Whew.

And then I have to go back in on the 28th of April and check in to make sure I'm okay, baby's okay. Alex seems to be absolutely perfect, and I *GAINED* 11 pounds. HOLY MOLY! I went from drastically losing weight to gaining it. They were well pleased.

AND!

I was talking to my doctor about post-partum and my fears. I grew up chronic depressive, and post-traumatic stress, a couple of things. So I worried that it might catch up with me. After taking a few tests, she agreed I was right in worrying about it-so we put me on Zoloft, which I'm getting today.

So all in all, a great day. Something to help battle the little-known post stuff. Insurance to make me breathe. And a new doctor that I am at ease with.

Great! The only thing that would make this better is finding out that I'm in the new apartment!

*which reminds me....I ought to pack....here....soon....do laundry....*

YEAH!

Happy Wednesday!

I am so hungry. All the time. And it's making me crazy.

Gabe texted me, I think. I'm kinda skiddish, but at the same time, not. I have to be able to handle this situation. Steve is pretty okay with it, and doesn't care for Gabe, obviously, but nonetheless, precautions ought to be taken.

Yesterday the baby was sitting up at the top of my stomach, and his little head was making a bump. It was pretty cool. Jen got to feel it, and she was properly in awe.

What frustrates me is the little turd will kick until I speak, or move or breath, and as soon as I put my hand there, he stops. It's like he's taunting me. I don't take well to taunting.

We found an apartment! Holy toledos! I believe it was 475 or 495 a month, two bedroom, and VERY spacious. EEK! That's so exciting! Steve's mom is willing to do pretty much anything to get us going, so we are very excited, she wants to help out with so much!

My grandma emailed me and wants to meet Steve and I for dinner. Of course, she's probably peeved at me for ignoring her, as is her right. I've been flaky with everyone lately, which is bad. My family hardly ever see's me. I have to make it a point to go see my parents this afternoon. :)

Other than that, I have tons of paperwork waiting for me, so I must get moving. Hope your Tuesday is great!

Every day I grow hungrier. By the freaking second. Yesterday, I had

*ahem*

Hashbrowns
Raisin Bran
Eggs in a Basket
Eggs in a Basket
hasbrowns
Nachos
RIce with beggies
Pizza
Ice cream
sandwich crackers

Then today, so far, I've had
Raisin Bran
Cheetos (erm..actually those came back up, didn't they?)
Malt o Meal
Omelette
Pickles
Ice cream
Butterfinger egg thingies (like...10 of them...I think that counts)
(and it's only 7:00 at night!)

I'm so hungry all the time. And I eat only things I know will go down.
Thus, the odd array of food before you.

Food is gregarious!

Steve called me after I left work, and said, "Um, I know this is moot, but...I'm putting Mike & Ikes in eggs for the Steering Committee-do you think I'm stingy by putting three in each?"
I had to laugh.
I did laugh when I found out he was actually seperating the flavors so the children didn't get an onslaught of orange Mike & Ikes. He was actually bitter about the amount of orange.

Gabe is back in town and doing Monday Night Bible Studies. Which means, that brings me and the ex kinda closer together than I want.

It's hard for me to say how I feel. I loved him, and we broke up when the passion was still so much alive, and we never really got over each other. Obviously, I love Steve, and would NEVER leave him. So, to guard my heart, I stay away from Gabe, and got rid of his number and stuff. It hurt to do, knowing that Gabe loved me, and wanted to be with me...but I know that if I stay out of sight, I'll stay out of his mind. Or at least, he wont know the pain of talking to me, or knowing I'm here and stuff. At least....he can think I hate him or don't care. That way, he'll move on.

It's wierd. But I know with out a shadow of a doubt I love Steve with more passion and desire than any man ever. So, it dilutes any thoughts.

Other than that, not much. I played a few games with Steve last night, and we had fun. We both went to bed after Grays Anatomy. Which was a good show, just so you know. I really like it. I wish they had it on earlier.

I'm hungry. Again.....so yeah. Got to feed the macine. Peace out.

I am slightly selfish I think. I hate being the only one awake or not being able to have as much fun as I want, when I want. When that happens, I usually start bugging Steve.

Steve didn't go to bed until 4:00 this morning, the crazy man. His ducky little friends were over and wanted to Roleplay...(like D&D)-but instead they all vegged in front of the TV. I wanted to smack the crap out of all of them.

Honestly, 4 is pushing it, my love.

We watched V for Vendetta last night, and I think the Wachowski brothers are trying to warn us about the dangers of our own governmentusing that movie. It sounds about right.

The only thing that bothered me was that I never did get to see V's face, although he had to of been old. If the people hurting him were ancient, icky looking peeps, he had to of been as well.

He sounded mature though. <---thats me. P for Paperbag.

My list of things I can no longer do is growing by the day.
I tried going up and down the stairs this morning, and by left leg started spazzing out from a Charlie Horse. Again. And this time I actually had to walk with it, because I was on the stairs, in my robe, and the guys were all asleep downstairs. And I know they say NEVER walk when your muscles lock up like that. YOu'll tear them. Great advise.

They were right? Now my left leg hurts really bad, and in order to go down the stairs, I have to hold the wall and railing for dear life.
*sigh*

I'm gonna have to wake up my man here soon, so he doesn't want to stay up all night again. Funny how sometimes they seem so much like children..... But I love him, and know he'll make a GREAT father-and I love his humor. And his gorgeous eyes. If I get a picture of his eyes, I will post them here. I call them Tiger-eyes.

Anyways, that's so far for me. Have a good Sunday!